Thursday 5 July 2012

A mind like swiss cheese

trails in particle acceleratorbooks for all purposes, what to expect when someone you love goes to jail
I hear that CERN have found my particle. I must admit, I hadn't realised I'd lost it. I'll hide it better next time.
body torso in a binbag murder investigation washed up on southsea beachAnyway, a dead geezer (torso only) in a binbag washed up on our seafront on Tuesday, leading to half of the Hampshire Police force doing a fingertip search of the beach, just where Los Dave and I do all our best work. I do hope they haven't found and taken all the number rocks.
where the dismembered torso washed up on southsea beachSo after school I insisted I wanted to play lego, even though it was bright and sunny and probably wouldn't be again for weeks. For exactly the same reasons Bud thought that we should have a bike ride. 1 short argument later, we left by bike for the seafront.
police search teams southsea seafrontWe arrived by the Pyramids and immediately saw a Police Community Outreach vehicle with plain clothes officers desperately pretending they were there to advise on postcoding your bicycle, but clearly trying to interview passers-by as to their movements and possible motives for dismembering a John Doe a couple of days ago.
headless body found in topless bar We bypassed them easily for I don't yet look like a serial or contract killer and went down to the site of the grisly discovery. We knuckled down and searched for the missing body parts but made no headway in the knee-deep water and came up empty-handed. I felt a heel so we gave it the elbow and hot-footed it back up the beach. The long arm of the law had had a head start, the overtime must have cost an arm and a leg. We did find a dozen or so number rocks, and threw flints at the exposed sea defences trying to splinter them. Meanwhile, various officers kept combing the beach nonchalantly.
Eventually we remounted and got 5 minutes in Canoe Lake water park, where we met Elizabeth, which is always nice. At home my annual school report reveals that I'm behind in reading and writing. I could have told you that (but only verbally, not on paper).

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