Tuesday 20 November 2012

A Rodent that has ceased to be

funny restaurant sign
The night light is back on. Following my early-morning excursion yesterday, I've opted to re-illuminate it. I'll put a couple of orange stickers over it to give it more of a sodium glare, then all I'll need is some Luminal sodium to help me sleep.
At school assembly today we learnt 2 more songs. He is doubtful as to the point of learning songs when I could be learning, for example, maths or language skills. But being able to sing "Donkey Plodding" or "Wiggly Nativity" fifty times each on the way to gymnastics can only get me closer to my boyhood ambition of becoming a castrato singer, which he assures me I will become if I sing these ditties sufficiently.
The very fact that I recorded the titles (in my little notebook) as "dongckey ploding"* and "wigerly nertiverty" only strengthens my argument. I also noted that the traffic on the "estern rode" was equally as jammed as on our usual route. Will we never find the perfect way to drive across this busy over-populated island?
On the way back, (through even more traffic generated by Portsmouth Football Club's insistence on trying to avoid bankruptcy by continuing to play) one of the news articles on the wireless broadcast-O-matic was about a club DJ called Deadmau5. He was describing the recent tendency of his fellow music professionals to pre-record their sets, and then during the actual club event night, to press play and simply stand there jiggling and pretending to mix their scratch desks or whatever it is these young people do nowadays. Coincidentally, on getting home, a dead mouse is exactly what we found behind the second freezer, once we had been alerted to the existence of the corpse (and associated drifts of coproliths) by Jof's keen sense of smell.
At bedtime he started to fill in little holes in my bedroom wall with DIY Ezi-plaster in preparation for painting. This was fine until I climbed onto the IKEA cupboard and kicked my milk onto the floor, when all activity suddenly ceased. I have a weekend off (sleepover at Ben's) and they will spend the time painting my sanctum sanctorum, baby.
* Whether it is an instantaneous black hole donkey (imploding) or a militant suicide donkey (exploding) is not known at this point

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