Monday 16 June 2014

Attack of the 50 foot Builder

funny fail for veteran gunner dick thrasherWoken up this morning by banging on the door.
I fact, I was disturbed at breakfast by the front door going again and Jof telling me to open it and let the builder in. As a genuine registered 8 year-old boy, you'll understand that I cannot cope with orders like 'Open the door' because my brain is already full of the following app, on continuous cycle:
O god I'm missing TV why won't she shut up I'm missing TV stop talking to me I'm missing TV I'm missing TV TV TV
so there is no more space in my head for any attention to divert.
Then it was Miss Mitchell's 24th birthday so she brought in fairy cakes, and we all set a-goblin.
After school I inspected the builders' progress and they have taken off the roof and all the wall tiles and made lots of mess and used up every teacup in the house in a tea ceremony steeped in tradition, hoho.
halifax bank customer service interview roomTea is the petroleum on which British workmen run, and we bought in extra supplies and that special white sugar which is a downgrade from brown but what can you do. Both builders are called Dave which makes it easier.
shower room with wall tiles removedFor several weeks now I have been trying to invest some money for my house deposit but our target financial institution has always been too busy to take my money or about to close or, in the most recent failed attempt, considered us militant money-launderers for some kind of offshore cell, it's the Gandalf beard and Yemeni accent that does it.
So last time they said bring in your passport. So today we did that. The kind chap then saw us waving a chequebook with intent to invest and got worried, and said no, what she meant to say was bring in both of your passports, some bills, a joint deposition by the Pope and Margaret Thatcher, and maybe a couple of videos of you building your own house back in 1912.
My homework is to research and make a presentation on my chosen country, Nice Korea. Wikipedia is really tough going for an 8 year-old: until I found out that Gangnam Style and some footballers came from there, I thought it was all boring.
Ben didn't look pleased at Scouts today. I think he's just hanging on for the camp, and will then resign his woggle because it isn't football.

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